Sweet woman, yes. I feel the same. Love hurts. Even when it's good love. When you have been through what we have been through, there are no clean slates. We will be hurt. It's just the hard truth. There are no unicorns and rainbows. It's just real life...with or without another person. Having them, if it is good, makes some things easier. But, no matter, there will be hard things and they will be a pain in the ass at times. I'm enjoying my man. And...and, yet , it is real. We are learning each other, slowly. Guarding my heart is something I need to learn how to do better, I know. I hope I am safe here. I think I am. But, after what I've been through. You never really know. Because of the deceit you wrote of. They don't lie, but because they don't know themselves, they cannot accurately and honestly represent themselves....like we do. Because that's just who we are. xoxo