I support very much the use of drugs to help what needs to be helped. The risk of taking them is often less than the risk of NOT taking them. Your experience is not rare and is so valid. No matter, we are guinea pigs, trying to figure out what works for us. There is so much we can do between lifestyle practices and choices, relationship repair and simply opening conversations around pain and grief. This, in a safe space would likely to better than any supplement or drug ever has.