Because we are all trying to convince ourselves it’s the best thing since sliced bread….because we bought into it, the shit and the joy of it all. Being partnered with men is just what it is, filled with the limitations of patriarchy, heirarchical structure, and power struggles, even with a “good” man. I love my man. But there are moments of every day that I wish I were not so heterosexual. I guarantee most women, who are very straight, are right there with me. Otherwise we would make different choices. (And try to convince ourselves and others everyday that we did the right thing). It’s just where we are in the evolution of the mess of mortality, Yael. Sad to admit it.